When we're excited and can't sleep, time drags on forever. When we're doing something we enjoy, time flies by. What does it even mean to "perceive time"? Is it really the time we are perceiving? Or is it the events or changes in time? This is just a paradox. In the notion of perceiving an event followed by another. Perhaps flowing in a straightforward motion.
So why is it, that if what we are really perceiving are the events, that they are what goes by the fastest? Shouldn't time slow down to allow us the most "time" in the pleasant instances?
What about your memory? What's the earliest memory you can remember? Think of a date in the past. Can you remember exactly what you did that day? But what about your graduation day? Or prom or wedding day? Or other memorable event? I bet a significant day you can remember exactly what the air smelled like when you woke up. There's no logical reason why we can't remember insignificant details of the past. The human brain is more than capable of it. In fact some people can.
What brought this up, you ask? In 5 days I'll be flying home. Back to the good old US of A. 4 1/2 months have flown by. Sure many time I felt like it would never end. But looking at the big picture, I feel like i just got here. Some moments I remember vividly - like my first night. I didn't have a phone, my computer battery was dead, and there was no internet. I was literally cut off from the world and there wasn't a single person I could talk to because there was no one here. I remember every thought that went through my head as I laid in bed crying, wondering if I made the right decision to come.
How do we perceive precedence amongst events? Why do I chose to remember that night over what I did the entire first few weeks? Life is full of these questions and I continue to ask myself how over 4 months have gone by and how I didn't take advantage of every opportunity here. I met so many great people but never actually got close to many of them. I guess part of knowing it's a terminal friendship kind of hinders that. It's a shame, too. With so much spare time and no extracurricular activities, why didn't I spend extra time studying to get A's in all of my classes? Sure I could have; but I decided to do more recreational activities instead. I guess that's just a choice in how we spend the little amount of time we are given.
I had a great time being here. The low points and emotional agony just made the good times even better. Life would be boring if nothing bad ever happened. Would the weeks before spring break been better if I wasn't in the hospital having emergency surgery? Sure. I wouldn't have missed so much school work, including a midterm and many lectures and I also would have had more time to enjoy my free time. But without being rushed around Sharjah in an ambulance, I'd have one less story to tell. I wouldn't be able to constantly laugh when I think about honey (ask me later, I might just tell you the story) or any of the other things that happened. I swear I could write a novel about those 3 days in the hospital!
Moral of the story: value the time you are given. You only get to live once.
It's been 130 days and I have only 5 left. Time to make them the best 5 days of the semester!
No comments:
Post a Comment